Rachel's Track x Track Description

 

“Two Bit”

 

Two Bit is a song of reflection. It centers around an early relationship, one where communication and respect were lacking. I wanted the first verse to describe the claustrophobic feeling of being passenger side in a vehicle where the driver is behaving erratically. You feel helpless and trapped. When you’re in a car you put all of your trust in whoever is in the driver's seat, and to have that trust be

blatantly disregarded is hard to grapple with.

 

The second verse details a lack of consent and communication. The progression from having your concerns ignored in the car on the drive home to in your room when you’re in a vulnerable position is one that, in my experience, happens slowly and without you even noticing. It is the slow and consistent chipping away at your autonomy until one day you turn around

and realize your words no longer carry any weight.

 

The chorus communicates situations of “almost, but not quite.” Something moments before or after perfection. A handful of sun- having the clouds come before you can bathe directly in the light. The tip of your tongue- having a word or phrase right on the tip of your tongue but not being able to communicate it. Freeze frame of a frown- A picture taken in the wrong moment, immortalizing discontentment. The tail of a train- missing the train by only a moment, and seeing it pull away. A misremembered date- missing what could have been a wonderful night or event due to a miscalculation. “It’s getting late.” Cutting a night short and retreating home. These all to me communicate the feeling of rationalizing an unhealthy relationship dynamic. You make so many small sacrifices and rationalize so many things you never thought you would. You live in the “almost, but not quite.” and spend

your time trying to convince yourself it’s perfect.

“Marian”

 

Marian is a song I wrote with my collaborator Justice Der. We started this song in our second year of university, and I actually ended up playing it in my final recital at the music school I was attending at the time. Justice started with the main guitar riff and fleshed out some chords around it. I then took it and added the melody and lyrics. This song takes a narrative approach, detailing a dysfunctional relationship. The lead character Marian continuously tries to justify and improve her situation to herself, but when the facts are laid in front of her it becomes clear something has to give.

“The Call’s Inside The House”

This song was written about a very personal event in my own life, but one that I unfortunately do not think is all that uncommon. In general terms, the song details when abuse occurs close to home. The phrase “The Call’s inside the house” is a trope that's been found in urban legends and movies for decades. The song draws parallels between the disturbing realization that the killer is in the house with you, and finding out abuse has taken place within your extended family. The feeling of something so evil finding its way into your home is a violating and terrifying feeling, and this song attempts to explore that.

 

 

 

 

“Clay Feet”

 

Clay Feet is my attempt at describing the desperate feeling of knowing you would do anything someone asked of you. It is meant to feel sweet at first, but then almost cloyingly so as the song progresses. The honeyed descriptions turn sickening as it's made more and more clear that the story being told is not one of reciprocal healthy love. The bridge “You can make my world as small as you want” highlights that if this person asked you to cut contacts, to change your character or your morals, you would do it. The song is meant to put a spotlight on the unnerving reality that sometimes love can make us do things we never thought we would.